


The Color of Comfort: Part One

by newnumbertwo



Category: Battlestar Galactica, Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: F/M, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-01
Updated: 2014-01-01
Packaged: 2018-01-06 23:59:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1113073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newnumbertwo/pseuds/newnumbertwo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the midst of Baltar's trial, Laura's illness, the ongoing war, and a few surprises that change could change everything, Laura, Bill, and Saul attempt to navigate through their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Color of Comfort: Part One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_Plaid_Slytherin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Plaid_Slytherin/gifts).



Title: The Color of Comfort: Part One  
Rating: T  
Word Count: ~7800  
Pairings/Characters: Bill/Laura/Saul, Laura/Saul, Bill/Saul, Laura/Bill, Caprica  
Disclaimer: don't own them.  
Summary: In the midst of Baltar's trial, Laura's illness, the ongoing war, and a few surprises that change could change everything, Laura, Bill, and Saul attempt to navigate through their relationship.  
A/N: Written for [](http://plaid-slytherin.livejournal.com/profile)[**plaid_slytherin**](http://plaid-slytherin.livejournal.com/)'s birthday. Posted a smidge early. Happy birthday, dear.  
A/N2: Much thanks for [](http://lanalucy.livejournal.com/profile)[**lanalucy**](http://lanalucy.livejournal.com/) for latching onto the idea so quickly, suggestions, encouragement, beta-ing, and the awesome title. *hugs*

Laura huddled closer between her lovers. Bill’s rack was a bit narrow for the three of them, but it was still wider than either her cot or Saul’s rack. Besides, it was the perfect excuse to snuggle closer. Gods knew they’d need those moments together - the warmth they brought - over the next several months.

Lying to her left, Saul shivered. Unlike Laura, he wasn’t cold, she knew. The _trial_ had taken a toll on each of them, but Saul had undeniably been hit the hardest. Her heart broke for him. After he’d been dismissed from the witness stand and court had been adjourned for the day, she had gone into his quarters to find him, relieved to see Bill already there, kissing Saul’s tearstained face. Laura had held them both, kissing them each in turn. It had been clear to Bill and to her that Saul needed their attention, and so they had given it to him, as one of their many unspoken agreements. They had move to Bill’s quarters, as the excuse of a senior staff meeting was much easier to sell. Not to mention his living space was much more spacious.

Saul opened his remaining eye and stroked her face. “I’m sorry I frakked up. I know how much you wanna see that bastard die.”

Did she? Probably. She wanted him to once and for all understand what he’d done to her people, his people. She wanted those same people to convict and sentence him. But it was up to the judges, up to Bill, and she knew better than to voice her wishes. He had barred Laura and Saul from discussing anything trial-related with him since his appointment. It was...frustrating, sure, but just another example of his honor, which was one of the many reasons she’d fallen for him in the first place, and she knew Saul felt the same. She reached for Saul’s hand and kissed his fingers, one by one. “I do wanna see him die, but not as much as I want you whole...for us.”

“Gods, Laura. Me too.” He rested his palm against her left breast. “I can’t feel it.”

A tear fell, unbidden. “You will soon enough.”

“Come here,” he said in an almost growl. She scooted even closer to him, letting his hands roam around her. “Love you. Love you both,” he said between kisses.

Then she felt another pair of hands on her. Bill. She moaned as they showed her such...love. Saul nuzzled the nape of her neck. “I don’t hear the music now.”

She didn’t know what that meant, but hoped it was progress for him, so she kissed his eyelid. Then she fell asleep nestled even closer between them.

The nothingness of sleep was interrupted. _The three of them stood in sickbay with a concerned Doctor Cottle, but he wasn’t looking at them. There was a woman. A Six. The one in their brig. She was lying on the bed, in obvious pain. And the three of them were telling her to hang on._ When Laura reached for the Six’s hand and held it, she woke up.

Bill opened his eyes as she sat up. “You okay?”

She stroked his cheek. “Go back to sleep, honey. I’m fine.” She gestured in the direction of the head. “I’ll be right back.”

He was asleep again before she finished her sentence. She smiled fondly. The day - and night - had taken a toll on him too.

She maneuvered around Tigh’s prone body. They really should rethink their arrangements if she was going to be making nightly trips to the head like this, but it was so...warm between them.

She entered the head and turned on the light. She moved to the sink and splashed some water on her face. The side effects had already begun. Last time, it had been hard to tell between dreams and visions. The ones that came during the day were obvious, but at night...it was all more fuzzy. But the one she’d just had had given her a similar _feeling_ as her other visions. Whether it was important or not and why, only time would tell, but she would be mindful in the future. And it wouldn’t hurt to speak to the Six. At the very least, they had a similar...dislike of Gaius Frakkin’ Baltar.

Feeling resolved, she returned to the rack, making a similar maneuver as before, but she fell slightly on Saul. Still asleep, he held her to him. “So soft, Laura. Love ya.”

She kissed his eyelid - the one covering his good eye. And rested against his chest, where he clearly wanted her. He could be so sweet sometimes. They both could be. How had she gotten so lucky? She fell back to sleep, leaving thoughts of the Six and her dream behind.

///////////////////////////////////////

Before the trial commenced for the day, Laura had an appointment with Doctor Cottle. He drew some more blood, and they discussed a game plan, which would begin immediately following the trial. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re treating it this time,” he said.

She nodded. “It’s different this time. I don’t need to hide it. And I have...people I can rely on.”

He grunted. “You always did. You were all just too stubborn to see it.”

She giggled. “That too.”

“Take your hippie drugs and leave my sickbay.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Before she exited through the curtain, she turned to him. “Thank you, Doctor.”

He nodded. “We’ll beat it again, Madame President.”

She left sickbay and checked her watch. She had a half hour to kill before the trial commenced, and Tory was...distracted of late. It was the perfect time for a visit.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////

She waved away the guards and entered the cell, instructing them to wait for her outside the door. She nodded over at the Six, who was shackled. “You won’t harm me, will you?”

Six looked so forlorn. “You know I won’t.”

Laura smirked. “You’ll forgive me if I’m a little hesitant to trust your...kind.”

Six shrugged.

“You don’t seem surprised to see me.”

“I’m not particularly. Although I didn’t expect you this morning.”

Laura looked at her hard. “Then you know why I’m here.”

Six nodded. “I do.”

In those two words, Six revealed much more than she perhaps had intended. She had obviously shared Laura’s dream.

“What did you see?”

Six blinked, remembering. “It was blurry at first, and then there was pain. Such terrible pain, but even then, I had hope and felt...love. It was God’s love, but it was even more than that.” She gazed at Laura in something approaching awe. “And you. In that moment, you and I, we were connected.” She blinked again. “And then I woke up.”

“Do you...why were you--”

“I don’t know why I was hurt, no. But what matters is that you cared. You might not trust my kind, and you might not trust me, but you will love me, Madame President.”

Laura tilted her head to the side. “And will you return that...love?”

Six nodded. “I already do.”

Laura didn’t know what to say to that, so she turned to leave. “I’m not sure I can believe everything, but your information to Colonel Tigh has thus far proven accurate.”

“Which doesn’t surprise you, as you’re the one who sent him here.”

Laura nodded. “I figured I’d give you the benefit of the doubt, seeing as you have been so helpful in the case against Baltar. And now, I have to go.”

Six met her eyes. “Good luck today, Madame President. Believe it or not, I want him to suffer every bit as much as you do.”

Laura gave a slight nod and exited the cell. She felt strangely comforted after the encounter, but still, she couldn’t shake the feeling the gods were testing her yet again. Sharon Agathon had been her guide last time. Perhaps this Six copy would also be a guide.

////////////////////////////////////////////////

Saul heard a knock at his hatch. Bill was still sulking in his quarters, and Laura was on _Colonial One_. Who else could it be? He pulled himself off the floor, where he had crawled to listen for the frakkin’ music. “Enter.”

He was faced with Dualla, who looked worse than he, if that were possible. She had a duffle bag strapped on her shoulder.

“I’m not looking for a roommate.”

That got _something_ out of her, a cross between a laugh and a sigh. “No offense, sir, but I don’t think we’d be a good fit. But I can’t stay there anymore.”

“Frakkin’ Lee.”

She nodded. “Frakkin’ Lee. And his beloved system.”

He gestured to his table, and she took a seat, placing her bag on the floor next to her. He sat across from her. “I can’t fix the system.” He sighed. “You need President Roslin for that.”

She nodded. “I know. And I believe in her, in what she represents. But for tonight, I need new quarters, and that’s something _you_ can do.”

“I’m not the acting XO, Dee.”

She looked him in the eye. “I know that too, sir. But you can still requisition quarters.”

Saul nodded. She was quiet but sneaky. Bill had told Saul how she’d convinced him to go after Laura and Lee, the rest of the fleet, on Kobol. Said she wouldn’t let up, even when he all but demanded she leave his quarters. “All right, hand me the frakkin’ papers.”

Of course she had them on her. She was so efficient, she and Gaeta. She handed them across the table to him. He signed his name and wrote his instructions. “I think you’ll be happy with this new spot,” he said when he returned the papers to her.

She grinned when she looked down. “Thank you, sir.” She grabbed her bag and exited his quarters. “I’m sorry about...everything,” she said on her way out.

“Me too, Dee. Me too.”

He hoped Gaeta and Hoshi could give her some comfort that night. It was important to be surrounded by friends during a time like this.

He grabbed the phone off his bulkhead. There was someone in more need of comfort than he. And he needed to pull his head out of his ass long enough to provide it.

////////////////////////////////////////////////

_“Finish what you started,” she said, knowing she was goading him. He. Deserved. It._

_“Why are you taking chamalla again, Madame President?”_

_He already knew the answer. He was turning green._

_She put the nail in the coffin. Leaning into the microphone, she said, “I’m taking chamalla again because my cancer has returned.”_

She collapsed onto her cot after her exhausting emergency press conference on _Colonial One_ and the even more tiring discussion with Tory. Laura shook her head. The young woman was supposed to be her backbone during all of _this_ like Billy had been, not that Tory could ever take his place. Billy had been one of a kind, and she missed him. But Tory had her own merits, and Laura was grateful for her; however, the aide needed to get it together and quickly. Somehow Laura knew she would, if only because she was so driven.

Her phone rang. She reached over to her bedside table and picked it up.

“Want me to take care of him? Because I will,” Saul said into the phone before she even said hello.

She giggled in spite of herself and the day she’d had. “That won’t be necessary. I think he’s been punished enough.”

“I don’t know about that, but you’re a better person than me.”

That wasn’t true. Different maybe, but not better. “How you holding up?”

He groaned. “I miss you. And Bill. And I want to clobber that frakkin’ kid, but…”

“He’s Bill’s son, and deep down, I think he’s sorry. You know he’s hurting.”

“No excuse for what he did.”

She sighed. “No, it’s not.”

“In other news, Dualla left him. She packed up and left their quarters. Then she came to me to requisition new ones.”

Anyone with eyes could have seen that marriage was doomed from the beginning. Lee Adama’s heart had always belonged to Kara Thrace, and as much as he wanted to love Dee, as good a wife as she had tried to be for him, they could never get around that simple fact.

“You know, I feel bad for both of them.” And she did. “They’re not lucky like us.”

He snorted. “You think we’re lucky?!”

She smiled into the phone. Saul was even more skeptical than Bill in some ways. “I do. What we have, it’s worth...everything else.”

“I love you, Laura. You gonna sleep okay tonight?”

She smirked. “Why? You offering to come over? Or sing me to sleep?”

He laughed. “I could try to sing. No promises that it’ll be any good.”

She giggled. “Don’t worry, I’ve heard Bill sing. I think I can handle anything.”

She lay back against her pillow, holding the phone against her ear, as Saul sang. It was a piece of a tune she recognized from when they were growing up during the First Cylon War. He was right; he didn’t have the best singing voice, still, it was exactly what she needed.

When he finished, she said she loved him and wished him a good night. She hung up the phone and fell asleep quickly, feeling much better about whatever the next day was going to bring.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Bill read the same passage five times before he realized it wasn’t happening for him. He sighed. The trial was getting worse and worse. He wished he hadn’t listened to Laura - had gone ahead and airlocked the bastard. Then things wouldn’t be so...broken. His son. Saul. And gods, Laura. Lee wasn’t responsible for her cancer, but as far as Bill was concerned, he might as well have been. He had added to their pain so much.

Bill threw on his dress coat over his tanks and left his quarters for the XO’s. He knocked on Saul’s hatch and heard him call, “Enter at your own risk.”

Bill decided it was worth whatever risk and stepped inside.

“Oh, it’s you,” Saul said after glancing up from his desk. “Figured you’d want some space.”

Bill nodded. “I did, but it got to be too much.”

“Well, have a seat, then.”

Bill sat down heavily.

“She’ll be okay, you know. I just talked to her. The woman…she’s a real trooper, Bill.” Saul was smiling fondly by the end of the sentence.

“Yeah, she is.”

“You didn’t see her on New Caprica. Did I ever tell you she smacked me?”

Bill looked incredulous and shook his head.

“It’s the gods’ truth. We had a difference in opinion, and she laid one on me. A good one too.”

Bill gave a small smile. Only Saul would use New Caprica to make him feel better. “Is that when you _knew_?”

“Nah. I knew that when she was in the brig. Those bright eyes of hers looking right at me like she was in a country club on Caprica.” He looked down at the floor. “I didn’t visit her much. Wanted to believe she was crazy. I wanted so much to believe you were right. And that she wasn’t...sick.”

Bill stood up and went to Saul’s side. He stroked Saul’s face and neck. Rubbed his shoulders.

“And that’s what she was like on New Caprica, Bill. She didn’t let anyone - the cylons, Baltar, or even the people - see her falter.”

Bill kept rubbing Saul’s shoulders. “That sounds like our girl. Why didn’t you go for her sooner?”

“After Kobol, I saw how the two of you were. I couldn’t put you through that.”

Bill shook his head. “We weren’t together like that. Between her illness and my condition at the time, and my feelings for you -” He squeezed Saul’s shoulder for emphasis before continuing, “It was complicated. We were...friends. I think she would have liked us to have become more sooner, but she never pushed. And I think she was worried about her illness and me - how I’d cope.”

Bill could feel the tears forming again. _It_ was back, and she was just as worried as ever about him, about them. Saul rose from his chair and turned to face Bill. “Gods, that woman of ours, huh.”

Saul stroked Bill’s face before kissing him. Then he led them to Saul’s rack. “Stay the night?” Saul asked.

Bill nodded. “Yeah, I’ll stay.” There was no way he could sleep alone that night.

//////////////////////////////////////

He padded down the corridor back to his quarters. No one paid him much mind. They just wished him a good morning and went on their way.

When he got back to his quarters, he entered the head for his morning ritual. He was just getting into his routine when he nicked himself. Then the phone rang.

“Yes?”

“Yell at me. I don’t want to get out of bed today. I don’t want to face them.”

He was torn between crawling into his rack or flying to _Colonial One_ to climb into hers. “You called the wrong person. I was just thinking about going back to bed myself.”

“Why? Are you feeling okay?”

There was so much concern, even if she wasn’t serious. She probably knew exactly what he had been up to. “Says the cancer patient.”

She gave a little laugh.

“I’m fine. Just cut myself shaving.”

He worked on stopping the bleeding with one hand while he held up the phone with the other. He attempted to yell at her, but there wasn’t much heat behind it, so he tried again, and she giggled in response. Gods, he could get lost in that sound so easily.

“Don’t let ‘em see you sweat, Laura.” Then he hung up.

She would have her first treatment that day. He wished he could be there. He’d ordered Doctor Cottle to send him the schedule, so Bill could rearrange his and/or Saul’s shifts so at least one of them could be with her. They were determined she wouldn’t go through it alone. Not this time. She had done enough of that during the first round.

He put on his dress greys for the farce of a trial and went to work.

/////////////////////////////////////

Laura had just concluded her first diloxan treatment. Neither Bill nor Saul could have been there with her, but she had been fine, though alone with her thoughts. They had prepared Bill’s quarters for her to move into while she was undergoing treatments, and they were certainly both hoping the arrangement would become permanent.

Doctor Cottle had instructed her to sit still while her body finished reacting to the toxins. He had snarked about her needing to slow the frak down, and as much as she desired to defy him, to defy her illness, her compliance, in this instance at least, was inevitable. She closed her eyes, and the images came.

She was in the Opera House again. Her hair was straighter and flat, a harsher red too. The dress was unlike any she owned now or had ever owned. She saw the Six, Gaius, and Sharon all after Hera, and she herself was walking hurriedly to catch the running toddler. She felt Hera was in serious danger and wanted nothing more than to return her to her mother or safety, whichever was the best option. Hera ran to Six and the blonde picked her up and carried her inside a room, and the door closed.

She awakened, screaming, and heard a child’s scream at the instant the door to the Opera House closed. Doctor Cottle grumped about it, but Laura insisted he take those things off her so she could see Sharon and Hera.

Laura walked with Sharon and Hera to their quarters where Karl was waiting. He wasn’t too happy to see Laura with his wife and child, but he said nothing, just smiled at Hera as he swung her up into the air. Sharon kissed her husband. “I’ll be back soon.”

Laura hung back as much as she could. She had interfered in the couple’s lives enough, but she wouldn’t change what she had done. And Hera would almost certainly have been killed if she had acted any differently.

“I don’t like you, Madame President. And I don’t trust you, but I trust what I saw, and I believe you care about Hera.”

Laura nodded. It was such a relief to hear someone aside from Bill, Saul, or Doctor Cottle be honest and straight with her for a change. “I do. Believe it or not, I always have.”

“Which is why you hid her instead of having her killed.”

Laura sighed. “There were no good options, I’m afraid.”

Sharon nodded curtly, effectively ending the discussion. “Just so you know, this is weird, even for me.”

Laura fought the urge to giggle. Events surrounding them had been “weird” from the very beginning. “I’m not sure if I find that comforting or terrifying.”

“Likewise.”

They approached the brig and entered Six’s cell. Laura again asked the guards to stay outside. She took one look at Six’s face and knew they were in no danger.

“You saw it too,” Six said to them both, although her focus was on Laura.

Laura nodded. “So did Hera. My question is how.”

Sharon started to explain about cylon projection, but Six interrupted, claiming these shared visions were different: cylon projections required physical contact between the cylon and the human, and the cylons chose the surroundings and circumstances of their projections. Laura agreed that what they had shared was very different, but it brought them no closer to knowing what they _had_ experienced.

“Whatever it is, Madame President, it’s God’s will. He’s communicating his plan for us and for Hera,” Six said.

Laura pondered this as she and Sharon exited the brig and went their separate ways

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

“Don’t take this the wrong way, Saul, but have you been drinking?” Bill asked.

They were sitting at his desk. It had started out as a meeting: The Admiral wanted his XO back. Saul put up his hands. “Yes, I’ve had some drinks, but you know me, Bill, I’ve never _heard_ things when I’ve been drinking before.”

Bill sighed. “That’s true.” He reached across the desk to hold Saul’s hand. “I know this trial and the memories of Ellen have put a lot of strain on you. Is it possible--”

Saul shook his head. “No frakkin’ way. If I was gonna go frakkin’ crazy, it would have been on New Caprica when frakkin’ Cavil was gouging my eye out.” Bill pulled back, but Saul held on to his hand, squeezing it tight. “Believe me, it’s some kind of cylon trick. And it’s in the ship. I don’t know how.”

Bill nodded. “All right, I’ll look into it, I promise. If it’s a trick, we’ll figure it out.” He stroked Saul’s hand. “Hey, you never know, it might have to do with how they were tracking us. Maybe our prisoner knows something.”

Saul sighed. “Yeah, I could ask her. It didn’t go so well the last time, though.”

“No? Laura seemed to get along fine with her.”

Saul shook his head. “I don’t know. It was like she, it, was peering into my brain, trying to read me. You know I don’t like crap like that.”

“Then you don’t have to see her. I know Leoben messes with people’s heads. Maybe the Six does the same somehow. And I certainly don’t want you falling prey to that.” Bill fixed his uniform. “I wish I didn’t have to go.”

“Well, you’re doing the fleet a great service by making sure that bastard dies. I’m proud of you, Old Man.”

Bill stood up and hugged Saul tight. “I’m proud of you too. Always.” He kissed Saul’s forehead. “Hang in there. I’ll see you later.”

Saul saluted him before exiting the quarters. Then he returned to his rack. He’d listen to the proceedings over the wireless. He just wasn’t up to facing anyone yet, as he never knew when the frakkin’ music would start. Or where.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Gaius Baltar is innocent. Those words felt vile on her tongue. Much worse than the taste of chamalla, which had undoubtedly contributed to this crushing blow. She met Bill at the CIC because she quite simply wasn’t ready to return to _Colonial One_. He wouldn’t quite meet her eyes as she approached him. He was obviously as upset as she. He, who would have seen Baltar disappear - perhaps just to please her - must have been seething at the verdict.

She met him on the bridge. “This must have been difficult to you. What happened? You couldn’t get the other two to budge?”

He didn’t answer. And she _knew_.

“You voted for his acquittal, didn’t you?”

He made some probably true but still irritating remark about the distinction between not guilty and innocent. That they should make the best of it and move on. He even used the jump to the nebula against her. Gods, why did he have to be right? He and Lee, two men who insist on doing the right thing, making the moral choices. She shoved him back a bit. It was an act of pure frustration, and it did little to make her feel better, but it clued him in to just how angry she was.

She considered leaving his CIC and getting into her raptor. Let him chase after her - and Saul. She suspected Saul was just as angry as she. Perhaps that was why he was absent, at the moment. While she was debating with herself, the power went out, corresponding closely with her dizziness. Was the timing a coincidence? She hadn’t experienced many of those since the attacks: Everything was connected.

She temporarily forgot her anger and followed Bill, as he ascertained the situation through Dee and Gaeta’s intelligence. The Cylons appeared, and the battle raged. They couldn’t jump the fleet for another twenty minutes. Another endgame. What a cosmic joke.

She listened as everyone shouted updates and instructions. After a few years of this, she was beginning to understand most of what was said, to the point where she could possibly run an op of her own, but she was grateful that was one area of the fleet she didn’t have to directly oversee.

Tory and Saul arrived. They both looked flustered. An anti-Baltar support group perhaps.

In the midst of the battle, Lee encountered a pilot who looked and sounded exactly like Starbuck. Bill shouted orders to confirm who and what she was, but Laura could see the hope (and love) burning in his eyes. He wanted so badly to believe Kara Thrace had returned to them, and Laura wanted that too. She wanted that for Bill and for Lee, and for everyone else who’d loved the pilot. And she wanted it for the fleet too. Their skies had always been a bit safer with Starbuck in the air, orbiting around their ships. But when weighed against the almost certainty that the pilot’s “return” was nothing more than a cylon trick, Laura was prepared to execute the pilot herself if it meant keeping everyone and everything she held dear safe. In her heart of hearts, she hoped she was wrong, that Kara was exactly who she claimed to be, that she had somehow defied the odds yet again. After all, that was something she and Kara Thrace had in common.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Things were going along around him. Starbuck was inexplicably back; the cylons were bearing down on the fleet. The battle was raging, and there was no way they were going to survive the twenty minutes it would take to spool up the FTL drives. But they would fight to the death, and he’d laugh in the bastards’ faces: He was Colonel Saul Tigh, XO of _Galactica_ , and that was the man he’d die being. Proudly dying alongside the two people he loved most in the worlds.

Bill gave him an order. Then he asked if Saul was okay. Saul felt like he was losing control. He heard himself say that things had never been clearer. Then his hand pulled his sidearm out and the gun fired, shooting Bill in the head, as Laura screamed. His eye widened in fear of what what he’d done.

But then he heard Bill repeat his order. Saul blinked. Everything was fine. Or as fine as it could be. He followed his CO’s commands and hoped that somehow having cylons in the fleet didn’t mean this was the end of everything.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Saul seemed a bit off. He had lost focus in the middle of the battle, and Bill’d had to repeat his command. That was worrying. She knew he had been under a lot of strain of late, that he hadn’t been the acting XO since after his testimony had gone so badly, but the CIC was the one place Saul Tigh was always at his best, discounting the time he had been in command when Bill was out of commission. She watched him pull himself together, and he seemed to be behaving normally.

It was good to have the XO back, and she knew Bill was relieved to see him standing across the table from them.

Gaeta shouted that they had lost a ship. She reviewed the manifest in her mind, mourning the loss of the souls on board. “How did they find us?” she asked.

Bill said that was the question. Perhaps the Six had an answer. Or perhaps she was the one who had led them to this moment. To their end.

/////////////////////////////////////////////

She sounded so sorrowful when she counted the number of souls on board that ship. Saul always marveled at how well she knew the manifests of the various ships in the fleet. It was so much more than that frakker Baltar ever bothered to remember. She asked how the cylons had found them.

How had they? Did it have to do with that godsdamn music? With him and the others within the fleet? Perhaps they’d been tracking Saul all along, and that was how they had been finding them for the last several years.

Maybe he should have airlocked himself and the others, end whatever frakkin’ plan the cylons had for them.

But he hadn’t, and now they were at their endgame.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Then the cylons just...left. Tory said something about a change. Laura asked what that meant, and Saul said he had no idea.

Could the cylons, who had chased them without quarter for years, be capable of mercy? And why now?

Laura had never been a violent person prior to the attacks. Aside from the boxing matches her father had taken her to as a child and young adult, she had never witnessed violence or subscribed to it. But after the attacks, she’d had no qualms about sending those...things out of an airlock, ordering the secret execution of Admiral Cain, and countless other acts that she knew were chipping away at what was left of her soul. She did those things because they were necessary, and she could bear the burden better than Bill. And at the time, she had thought her life would be coming to an end soon. What a lie that had turned out to be.

She ordered the genocide of the cylon race, and would have gladly born the weight and guilt of that decision if it meant protecting the people in her charge.

So why in the worlds did the cylons pull back when they could have ended this war, wiping humanity out once and for all? She wouldn’t have hesitated if she’d been in that position.

Could it have had something to do with the Six in their brig? Perhaps there was something to the visions they had shared. To Hera and her connection to both races. Six claimed to have regard for Laura that she described as love. Was that regard at work here? And could Laura ever care for a cylon as Six claimed she would? Was that what was ultimately keeping the fleet together?

Or maybe Starbuck’s return was part of their plan. And there would be another ambush later.

Starbuck had docked her viper, and it was time to find out what was happening. The cylons, for whatever reason, had given them this time, and they needed to be smart about how they used it.

She rubbed her head before walking alongside Tory out of the CIC. They would wait in Bill’s quarters for the debriefing, while Bill, Saul and the marines met Starbuck on the flight deck.

////////////////////////////////////////

Bill watched Starbuck climb out of her viper and talk to Chief and the other deckhands like nothing was out of the ordinary at all. Like she was returning from any other routine mission. And as the marines approached her, their guns pointed at her, she looked so...betrayed.

“Do you believe in miracles?” Saul asked.

There were moments Bill almost could believe in them, most of which surrounded Laura, though Kara had always been so lucky. A religious person might call that miraculous. But he wasn’t one of those people. And there was no acceptable explanation for Kara’s return to him now. It was almost...cruel. And that cruelty was what made him inclined to agree with Laura: It was a cylon trick. Nothing more. And the girl he had loved as a daughter was gone. “No,” he said.

He ordered her to report to Doctor Cottle, and then he and Saul headed to his quarters to await the results with Laura and Tory. Perhaps Laura had gotten over her anger by then, assuming she even remembered the trial, considering the events of the last hour.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////

Could she really be a cylon? Saul would have thought that was impossible just hours ago. Much like he had _known_ he was human. At Bill’s gentle prodding, he had taken Baltar’s test, not long after Ellen’s results had come back. He had been declared human, and Bill had clapped his back. “I never had any doubt,” he had said.

He had been tortured on New Caprica. And he had killed Ellen just for cooperating with the cylons, and here he was one, had been one all along. So if Colonel Saul Tigh, veteran of the First Cylon War was a frakkin’ cylon, then there was no reason Captain Kara Thrace, the fleet’s top gun, couldn’t be one as well. Perhaps she had returned because of the music. Perhaps she had been drawn to him and the other three, just as they had been drawn to each other before the battle.

He resolved to keep his mouth shut as he watched what she did. Maybe she would seek them out, assuming Bill and Laura didn’t have her confined to the brig.

/////////////////////////////////

Laura had never resented her role before, but she did during their meeting with Kara. She couldn’t even sit on the sofa out of agitation. It was _Kara_ as Laura had always seen her, known her. She was snarky, disrespectful, and refused to kowtow to any of the authority figures in front of her. She was...perfectly Starbuck. And she wanted so badly to believe it was truly Bill’s daughter returned to them. But the difference between six hours and two months could never add up. Nor could the pilot’s inability to explain anything about where she was or how she had returned to them.

She felt slightly hypocritical dismissing Kara’s _feelings_ when she had given such merit to her own visions and prophecies, but Laura had never disappeared for several months. Besides, it wasn’t the _feelings_ she objected to but the possibility they had come from a cylon.

Laura’s visions and the Book of Pythia would lead them to Earth. Whatever the false Kara sitting before her said, her role was to distract them at best and at worst, it was to lead them to certain ambush.

And Laura would have to be the one to hurt Bill, to remind him as many times as necessary that his daughter was dead. It would almost be like she was the one taking Kara away from him. But in the interest of keeping him, Saul, and the fleet safe, she would do what she must.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////

He couldn’t hear the frakkin’ music anymore, and neither could the others. He swore they weren’t like Boomer, that they knew who they were, and that would allow them to make their own choices, be the people they had always been. Saul had always wanted to be a man Bill could count on. Now he wanted to be a man both Laura and Bill could count on. He wanted to give them strength when they needed it, hold Laura’s hand as she went through her treatments, hold Bill as he cried about Laura on the nights she spent on _Colonial One_. There was no way he could be triggered like Boomer had been. The poor cylon may have loved the Old Man, but Saul was in love with him and Laura, and that would trump any possible programming.

But could he tell them? They were bent out of shape just from thinking Starbuck was a cylon, while he actually was one. Did they love him enough to trust him? To spare him? And would he be strong enough to let them airlock him if that was best for the fleet?

He didn’t know, but he would continue being the man they needed in the meantime.

////////////////////////////////////////

Laura stood before the Six, who looked at her expectantly. “I don’t really know why I’m here.” That was honest, even for Laura. “I’m here because of the things we’ve seen, the visions we’ve shared.”

Six nodded.

“And I would like your help in understanding what you refer to as the final five cylons.”

Six looked her in the eye. “You want to know if Kara Thrace is one.”

Laura nodded slightly.

“We’re programmed not to think of them.”

“Well, the programming doesn’t work because you’re thinking about them now.”

“I try not to.”

“Trying not to is thinking. How do you rationalize that?”

It was amazing how irrational these _machines_ could be. Their clinging to the love of a god or the One True God, whatever. Her own mind seemed more logical, more calculating than that of a cylon, or at least more than this Six.

The Six stood up and stepped in front of Laura. The guard ran into the cell, gun pointed at Six. Laura looked into Six’s eyes and saw no threat there. She put up her hand and looked at the guard. “Okay, back off. Don’t leave, but back off.”

Then she gave her full attention to the Six, who leaned in close enough to whisper. “They’re close.”

“The five?”

Six nodded. “I can feel them.”

“They’re in the fleet?”

“They’re on this ship.”

Gods, that was distressing news. The cylon detector had obviously failed. Perhaps it was Baltar’s plan to sabotage them from the beginning, and she and Bill had played into his hands. “But you don’t know who they are?”

Six shook her head. “I’ve never seen them.”

“Is that how your fleet found us?”

“I don’t know. Maybe they knew you’d be at the nebula. They’ve known about your quest for Earth and knew that was the next step. It seems logical they would have been lying in wait.”

“So it isn’t about the five?”

Six shook her head. “None of us know who or where they are. We have no way of tracking them.” She sighed. “I’ll tell you one thing, though. Whatever happened out there, when they backed off? That probably wasn’t part of their plan. Cavil, he isn’t merciful. He wouldn’t just quit.”

Laura sighed. “I didn’t think so, either.”

Her memories of Cavil, his sneering as she heard the torture going on in the surrounding cells, there had been no mercy then, and she knew he would show none now, but he had, or someone among their fleet had.

“Something changed, Madame President. And I have a feeling we’re at the center of that change, somehow.”

Laura nodded. “Thank you. I’ll see you again.” She moved toward the exit and turned back. “And I’ll talk to the Admiral about having your shackles removed.”

Six nodded over at her. “You’re beginning to love me. Don’t be afraid of that, or of their love.”

Did she mean the gods, her One True God, the final five, or Bill and Saul? She shook her head and headed for Bill’s quarters. The mysteries of Kara Thrace and the aborted plan for their destruction remained, but it was a comfort, however slight, that Six was mystified by them as well. At least she claimed to be.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He entered the CIC and saw Starbuck desperately trying to find the star system she had allegedly found. When he approached, she talked about her “feeling” of where Earth was. He was a pragmatist; he didn’t go in for “feelings” or “visions,” and the two most important women in his life were pulling him in two different directions. He was just beginning to accept the possibility that Laura was right about the gods, her visions, and her role as the Dying Leader. He wanted to believe in her because he loved her, and his faith in Laura was important to her, even if she never said so.

What was he supposed to do with Kara? Even if he could embrace her “feelings,” how could he explain her viper. “I’ve just come back from your viper. There’s not a scratch on it. It’s brand new.” He could barely get the words out. “How do you explain that?”

She couldn’t.

And he left, brokenhearted, as there was more evidence in favor of her being a cylon.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

He found Lee glued to the screen, watching Kara die again and again. He sat on the other side of the room. “Should I believe my heart or my eyes?”

“You know where I stand,” Lee said.

His faith in Starbuck had been steadfast this whole time. He had even butted heads with Laura and Bill over it, desperate to defend his friend, to believe she was really back.

Lee asked him how he would feel if it were Zak, and Bill really didn’t have an answer. Could he love a machine? Was his love for Starbuck such that he could overlook the probability that she was a cylon? He had loved Boomer, and she’d shot him in the middle of his CIC. Would loving Starbuck be just as risky?

Lee asked if Laura was still staying in his quarters. The tone of his voice indicated he had no idea of the nature of their relationship, or that it included Saul. He responded with the same party line Laura had prepared for the press. Things were just too tense with his son at the moment, and in some ways, he was more apt to trust Kara, even with the uncertainty swirling around her, than Lee, especially in matters regarding Laura and Saul. He wondered how Laura felt about Lee entering politics. They would have to work together, get along for the sake of the fleet.

Lee left him there, watching the frozen screen of his beloved daughter’s viper exploding. One thing was certain: Time was short, and he had wasted enough of it.

He headed for his XO’s quarters first, determined they would be home when Laura arrived.

////////////////////////////////////

When Laura entered Bill’s quarters, he and Saul were waiting on the sofa. She sat between them, and their hands automatically went to her shoulders. She arched against their hands and let them work. She was still angry with Bill about the trial, but with everything else going on, she just couldn’t let anything put a wedge between them. They knew she wouldn’t be up for much on treatment days, but they were prepared to shower her with love in any form she could handle.

“I never asked how the treatment went,” Bill said.

She moaned as he kneaded a particularly tense spot. “As well as could be expected, but then something happened.”

“What?” Saul asked. His hand left her shoulder, and if she wasn’t careful he’d leave to fight some force.

“It’s not like that. Not bad. Not good either. Just...I had a vision, and the Six, Sharon, and Hera had it too. Sharon and Hera were in sickbay with me, but Six was in the brig, yet we all shared the same vision.”

“Can’t blame the chamalla then,” Saul said.

“What kind of...vision?” Bill asked.

Laura described what they had seen. How Hera had run, oblivious to the danger. She explained how the threat wasn’t readily apparent, but all three women had sensed it. Bill and Saul listened and rubbed her shoulders. They made no comment. She knew they were both skeptical, especially given the events of the last several hours, and she understood completely, but it was nice that she could share it with them without worrying about the consequences. Saul was even more supportive than usual, though. “Whatever it is, Laura, you’ll figure it out. And maybe it’ll help lead us to Earth.”

She turned to kiss them both. “I gotta do some paperwork. May I use your desk, Admiral?”

Bill stroked her hair. “Of course.”

“Don’t stay up too late. Doctor Cottle will yell at us. Or Tory will,” Saul said.

She grinned. “I promise I’ll be as quick as I can, but I wouldn’t be too opposed to being dragged to bed.” She winked. “I mean if I take too long.”

It was wrong to tease them like that when she knew she couldn’t follow through, but there were other things they could do, and of course, she could always watch them.

“And that’s why you’re in charge, Laura. Damn, Bill, why didn’t we ever think of that?!”

Bill chuckled. “We were probably worried about what she’d do to us.”

Laura smacked his arm, lightly, and then she stood up to sit at the desk. There was a mountain of paperwork waiting for her, and she needed to get to it while she was still alert.


End file.
